1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female.... Any part under a car's hood.
Male..... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male.... Playing cricket without a box.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female.... A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male.... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female.... An embarrassing by product of indigestion.
Male...... A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.

7 MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female...... The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male.. Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.

8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

Dear Father,

$chool i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply an't think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.

Love,
Your $on.

After receiving his son's letter, the father immediately replies by sending a letter back.

Dear Son,

I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.

Love,
Dad

Jocelyn married William this day. At the end of the wedding party, Jocelyn's
mother gave her a newly opened bank saving passbook. With $1000 deposit
amount.

Mother: 'Jocelyn, take this passbook. Keep it as a record of your marriage
life. When there's something happy and memorable happened in your new life,
put some money in. Write down what it's about next to the line. The more
memorable the event is, the more money you can put in. I've done the first
one for you today. Do the others with William. When you look back after
years, you can know how much happiness you've had.'

Jocelyn shared this with William when getting home. They both thought it was
a great idea and were anxious to know when the second deposit can be made.

This was what they did after certain time:

- 7 Feb: $100, first birthday celebration for William after marriage
- 1 Mar: $300, salary raise for Jocelyn
- 20 Mar: $200, vacation trip to Bali
- 15 Apr: $2000, Jocelyn got pregnant
- 1 Jun: $1000, William got promoted
.
.
.
.
..... and so on...

However, after years, they started fighting and arguing for trivial things.
They didn't talk much. They regretted that they had married the most nasty
people in the world.... no more love... Kind of typical nowadays, huh?

One day Jocelyn talked to her Mother:

'Mom, we can't stand it anymore. We agree to divorce. I can't imagine how I
decided to marry this guy!!!'

Mother: 'Sure, girl, that's no big deal. Just do whatever you want if you
really can't stand it. But before that, do one thing first. Remember the
saving passbook I gave you on your wedding day? Take out all money and spend
it first. You shouldn't keep any record of such a poor marriage.'

Jocelyn thought it was true. So she went to the bank, waiting at the queue
and planning to cancel the account.

While she was waiting, she took a look at the passbook record. She looked,
and looked, and looked. Then the memory of all the previous joy and
happiness just came up her mind. Her eyes were then filled with tears. She
left and went home.

When she was home, she handed the passbook to William, asked him to spend
the money before getting divorce.

The next day, William gave the passbook back to Jocelyn. She found a new
deposit of $5000. And a line next to the record: 'This is the day I notice
how much I've loved you thru out all these years. How much happieness you've
brought me.'

They hugged and cried, putting the passbook back to the safe.

Do you know how much money they had saved when they retired? I did not ask.
I believe the money did not matter any more after they had gone thru all the
good years in their life.

IDIOCY (noun):- Extreme Mental Retardation.

Below are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately . OK?
Let's find out just how clever you really are....
Ready? GO!!!

First Question:
You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?

Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are
absolutel! y wrong! If you overtake the second person, you take his place, so you are second!

Try not to screw up next time. Now answer the second question,
but don't take as much time as you took for the first one, OK ?
Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are...?
Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?

You're not very good at this, are you?
Third Question:
Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only.
Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.
Take 1000 and add 40 to it.. Now add another 1000 . Now add 30 .
Add another 1000 . Now add 20 . Now add another 1000
Now add 10 . What is the total?

Did you get 5000?

The correct answer is actually 4100.

If you don't believe it, check it with a calculator!
Today is definitely not your day, is it?
Maybe you'll get the last question right....
..Maybe.

Fourth Question:
Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono. What is the ! name of the fifth daughter?

Did you Answer Nunu?
NO! Of course it isn't.
Her name is Mary. Read the question again!

Okay, now the bonus round:
I may have sent this one before. I! 'm never sure.

A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By
imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully
expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is
done.

Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of
sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?

He just has to open his mouth and ask...
It's really very simple....!

If you answer correctly...at least satisfy with this... that's why it is called bonus...

Friendship between women:

A woman didn't come home one night.
The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house.
The man called his wife's 10 best friends.
None of them knew anything about it.

Friendship between men:

A man didn't come home one night.
The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a buddy's house.
The woman called her husband's 10 best friends.
Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two claimed that he was still there.

Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it
saying: "Free to good home.You want it, you take it." For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge for sale $50." The next day someone stole it.

>>> >Caution... They Walk Among Us!

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted...."Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and >said... "where???"

>>> >They Walk Among Us!!

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff."

>>> >They Walk Among Us!!

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center.
One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh,
Pacific".
>>> >They Walk Among Us!!!

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria,
when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but, "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving."

>>>> They Walk Among Us!!!!

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it's designed to
cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk...

>>> >They Walk Among Us!!!!!

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.... >>> >(maybe I should have bought 10 cases)

>>> >They Walk Among Us!!!!!!

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trainedprofessional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has you plane arrived yet?"...

>>> >They Walk Among Us!!!!!!!!

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

>>> >Yep, they walk among us>>> >AND they reproduce!

The Saptapathi rites involves taking seven steps walking around the fire. According to Hindu Law codes [Yalgnavakya Smrithi], completion of the seventh step is the moment of completion of marriage for all legal purposes. For each step they say a manthra as follows:

Step 1. Groom: "My beloved, our love became firm by walking one step with me. You will offer me the food and be helpful in every way. I will cherish you and provide for the welfare and happiness of you and our children.

Step 1. Bride: "This is my humble submission to you, my lord . You kindly gave me responsibility of the home, food and taking charge of the finance. I promise you that I shall discharge all responsibilities for the welfare of the family and children.

Step 2. Groom : My beloved, you have now walked the second step with me. Fill my heart with strength and courage and together we shall protect the household and children.

Step 2. Bride: My lord, in your grief, I shall fill your heart with strength, In your happiness, I shall rejoice. I promise you that I will please you always with sweet words and take care of the family and children and you shall love me alone as your wife.

Step 3. Groom: My beloved, now you have walked three steps with me. By virtue of this, our wealth and prosperity are bound to grow. I shall look upon all other women as my sisters. Together, we will educate our children and may they live long.

Step 3. Bride: My lord, I will love you with single minded devotion as my husband. I will treat all other men as my brothers. My devotion to you is of a chaste wife and you are my joy. This is my commitment and pledge to you.

Step 4. Groom: My beloved, it is a great blessing that you have walked four steps with me. You have brought auspeciousness and sacredness into my life. May we be blessed with obedient and noble children. May they be blessed with long life.

Step 4. Bride: My lord, I will decorate you from your feet up with flowers, garlands and anoint you with sandal wood paste and fragrance. I will serve you and please you in every way.

Step 5. Groom: My beloved, now that you have walked the five steps with me, you have enriched my life. May God bless you. May our loved ones live long and share in our prosperity.

Step 5. Bride: My lord, I share both in your joys and sorrows. Your love will make me trust and honor you. I will carry out your wishes.

Step 6. Groom: My beloved, you have filled my heart with happiness by walking six steps with me. May you fill my heart with great joy and peace from time to time.

Step 6. Bride: My lord, in all acts of righteousness, in material prosperity and in every form of enjoyment and divine acts, I promise you that I shall participate and shall always be with you.

Step 7. Groom: My beloved, as you walked the seven steps with me, our Love and friendship became eternal. We experienced spiritual union in God. Now you have become completely mine and I offer my life to you. Our marriage will be for ever.

Step 7. Bride: My lord, as per the law of God and the Holy scriptures [Vedas] I have become your spouse. Whatever promises we gave, we have spoken with pure mind. We will be truthful to each other in all things. We will love each other for ever.

After these seven steps, the marriage become legal by Hindu law codes. Then, they both say: "Now let us make a vow together. We shall share the same food, share the strengths, the same tastes. We shall be of one mind, we shall observe the vows together; I shall be the Sama, you the Rigveda; I shall be upper world, you the earth; I shall be the Sukhilam. you the Holder; Together we shall live and beget children, and other riches. Come thou, Oh, sweet-worded girl."

Sapthapathi Mantras - shorter version

The following are the Manthras for the seven steps around the Holy Fire during the Sapthapathi commonly used in South India in the Smãrtha Sampradhãya, which is a shorter version of that in the Yajñyavãkkya Smrithis.

Step 1.:- Ekamishe - Vishnuthva - Anvethu -
Step 2.:- Dhve Oorjve - Vishnuthva - Anvethu -
Step 3.:- Threeni Vruthaya - Vishnuthva - Anvethu -
Step 4.:- Chathvaari Maayo - Vishnuthva - Anvethu -
Step 5.:- Pancha Pasubhyaha - Vishnuthva - Anvethu -
Step 6.:- Shadru Thubhyaha - Vishnuthva - Anvethu -
Step 7.:- Sapth Sapthabhyaha - Vishnuthva - Anvethu -

"Sakaa -Sapthapadha -bhava Sakaayov -Saptha padhaa –Bhaboova"
By these seven steps you have taken with me, you have become my best friend.

"Sakyam -the' -Ghame'yam Sakyaath -the' Maayosham -Sakyan me"
I will never move out of this relationship. God has united us in this bondage.

"Maayosta -Samayaava -Samayaava Sangalpaavahai –Sampriyov"
We shall perform all activities together with love and affection.

"Rosishnu -Sumanasyamanov Ishamoorjam - abhi –Savasaanov"
Let us be friendly in our thoughts. Let us observe our duties and rituals together.

"Managhumsi -Samvrathaas smu Chiththaani -Aakaram –Sathvamasi"
If you are the lyrics, I am the music. If you are the music, I am the lyrics.

"Amooham -Amoohamasmi saa -Thvam –dhyowraham"
If I am the heavenly body, you are the earthly world.

"Pruthivee thvam -Retho' aham -retho' Bhruthvam –Manohamasmi"
While I am the life source, you are the carrier of the same.

"vak thvam -Saamaa ham asmi -Rukthvam –Saamaam"
I am the thoughts and you are the speech.

"Anuvradhaa -bhava Pumse' Pumse' -Puthraaya- Veththavai"
While you are the words, I am the meaning.

"Sriyai -Puthraaya -Veththavai ehi -Soonrurute"
With your sweet words, come with me to lead a prosperous life begetting our progeny with [male] children.

Maangalyam Shloka

mAngalyam tantunAnena mama jIvanA hethunA |
kaNThe: badhnami subhage! sanjIva Sarada: Satam ||

Meaning: This is a sacred thread, this is essential for my long life. I tie this around your neck
O maiden, having many auspicious attributes, may you live happily for a hundred years

soniye hiriye teri yaad aandi ye
seene vich tadapta hai dil jaan jaandi ye....[2]

tuhi jind meri ye dil da karaar ni..
tuhi jind meri ye dil da karaar
tu aaja tenu rabda wasta..[2]
udekta main tera rasta

kinna tenu chaava ey na samjhi tu..
tere naam kitti zindagii,
jab tu milengi tenu dassange
tere naal meri har khusi...

tuhi jind meri ye dil da karaar ni..
tuhi jind meri ye dil da karaar
tu aaja tenu rabda wasta..[2]
udekta main tera rasta

soniye hiriye teri yaad aandi ye
seene vich tadapta hai dil jaan jaandi ye...

suna suna dil da aasiyaana hai
suni zameen ho asmaa..
khoya khoya renda mera paagal dil
aaja laut ke hun aa bhi jaa...

tuhi jind meri ye dil da karaar ni..
tuhi jind meri ye dil da karaar
tu aaja tenu rabda wasta..[2]
udekta main tera rasta

soniye hiriye teri yaad aandi ye
seene vich tadapta hai dil jaan jaandi ye...[2]


seene vich tadapta hai dil jaan jaandi ye...

soniye ......jaan jandi ye

jaan jaandi ye


singer:shael
album:aitbaar

Ho, goom hai kisi ke pyaar mein dil subaah shaam
Par tumhe likh nahin paaoon main uska naam
Haai raam, haai raam
Subaah shaam

--FEMALE--
Ho, goom hai kisi ke pyaar mein dil subaah shaam
Par tumhe likh nahin paaoon main uska naam
Haai raam, haai raam

--MALE--
Ho, socha hai ek din main usse milke
Keh daaloon apne sab haal dil ke
Aur kar doon jeevan uske hawaale
Phir chhod de chaahe apna bana le
Main to uska re hua deewaana
Ab to jaisa bhi mera ho anjaam
Goom hai kisi ke pyaar mein dil subaah shaam
Par tumhe likh nahin paaoon main uska naam
Haai raam

--FEMALE--
Haai haai haai haai raam
Chaaha hai tumne jis baawri ko
Voh bhi sajanwa chaahe tumhi ko
Naina uthaaye to pyaar samjho
Palkein jhuka de to ikraar samjho
Rakhti hai kab se chhupa chhupaake
Apni honton mein piya tera naam
Goom hai kisi ke pyaar mein dil subaah shaam
Par tumhe likh nahin paaoon main uska naam

--MALE--
Ho, goom hai kisi ke pyaar mein

--FEMALE--
Dil subaah shaam

--MALE--
Par tumhe likh nahin paaoon

--FEMALE--
Main uska naam

--MALE--
Haai raam

--FEMALE--
Haai raam

Searching the song for a while, finally find it, dis song keep remind me of my childhood days, DD1 rangoli, wow miss those days :)

Dheere Dheere Bol Koi Sun Na Le
Sun Na Le Koi Sun Na Le
Sej Se Kaliyan Chun Na Le
Chun Na Le Koi Chun Na Le
Humko Kisi Ka Darr Nahin
Koi Zor Jawaani Par Nahin
Dheere Dheere...
Kuchh Keh Le Kuchh Kar Le Yeh Sansar
Hum Premi Hain Hum To Karenge Pyar
Koi Dekh Le...To Dekh Le
Koi Jaan Le...To Jaan Le
Koi Dosh Hamaare Sar Nahin
Koi Zor Jawaani Par Nahin
Dheere Dheere...
Baaton Ke Badle Aankhon Se Lo Kaam
Varna Hum Ho Jayenge Re Badnam
Naadan Tum, Anjaan Hum
Beimaan Tum, Beimaan Hum
Kyon Chain Tumhe Pal Bhar Nahin
Koi Zor Jawaani Par Nahin
Dheere Dheere...
Ek Ek Din Ab Lagta Hai Ek Saal
Tere Bina Ab Mera Bhi Hai Yahi Haal
Aa Pyaar Kar...Duniya Se Dar...
Mat Door Ja...Mat Paas Aaa...
Maein Sheesha Hoon Pathhar Nahin
Koi Zor Jawaani Par Nahin
Dheere Dheere...

hujoor is kadar bhee naa itaraake chaliye
khule aam aanchal naa laharaa ke chaliye

koee manachalaa agar pakad legaa aanchal
jaraa sochiye aap kyaa kijeeyegaa
lagaa de agar, badh ke julfon mein kaliyaan
to kyaa apanee julfe zatak dijeeyegaa

badee dilanashee hain haseen kee ye ladeeyaan
ye motee magar yoo naa bikharaayaa kije
udaa ke naa le jaaye zonkaa hawaa kaa
lachakataa badan yoo naa laharaayaa kije

bahot khubasoorat hain, har baat lekin
agar dil bhee hotaa, to kyaa baat hotee
likhee jaatee fir daastaan-ye-mohabbat
yek afasaane jaisee mulaakaat hotee

Movie Name: The Great Gambler (1979)
Singer: Asha Bhosle
Music Director: Burman R D
Lyrics: Anand Bakshi
Year: 1979

Do Lafzo.N Kii Hai, Dil Kii Kahaanii
Yaa Hai Mohabbat, Yaa Hai Javaanii

Dil Kii Baato.N Kaa Matalab Na Puuchho
Kuchh Aur Hamase Bas Ab Na Puuchho
Jisake Liye Hai, Duniyaa Diivaanii
Yaa Hai Mohabbat, Yaa Hai Hai Javaanii

Is Zi.Ndagii Ke, Din Kitane Kam Hai
Kitane Hai Kushiyaa.N, Aur Kitane Gam Hai.N
Lag Jaa Gale Se, Rut Hai Suhaanii
Yaa Hai Mohabbat, Yaa Hai Javaanii

Ye Kashtii Vaalaa, Kyaa Gaa Rahaa Hai
Koii Ise Bhii, Yaad Aa Rahaa Hai
Jisake Liye Hai, Duniyaa Diivaanii
Yaa Hai Mohabbat, Yaa Hai Javaanii

Do Lafzo.N Kii Hai, Dil Kii Kahaanii
Yaa Hai Mohabbat, Yaa Hai Javaanii

What I dream I had:
Pressed in organdy;
Clothed in crinoline of smoky burgundy;
Softer than the rain.
I wandered empty streets
Down past the shop displays.
I heard cathedral bells
Tripping down the alley ways,
As I walked on.

And when you ran to me
Your cheeks flushed with the night.
We walked on frosted fields of juniper and lamplight,
I held your hand.
And when I awoke and felt you warm and near,
I kissed your honey hair with my grateful tears.
Oh I love you, girl.
Oh, I love you.
Courtesy :From Simon and Garfunkel: For Emily, Whenever I May Find Her

So youre leaving
In the morning
On the early train
But I could say everythings alright
And I could pretend and say goodbye

Got your ticket
Got your suitcase
Got your leaving smile
Oh, I could say thats the way it goes
And I could pretend and you wont know
That I was lying

Because I cant stop loving you
No, I cant stop loving you
No, I wont stop loving you
Why should i

We took a taxi
To the station
Not a word was said
And I saw you walk across the road
For maybe the last time, I dont know

Feeling humble
Heard a rumble
On the railway track
And when I hear the whistle blow
I walk away and you wont know
That ill be crying

Because I cant stop loving you
No, I cant stop loving you
No, I wont stop loving you
Why should i

Even try
Ill always be here by your side (why why why)
I never wanted to say goodbye
Im always here if you change, change your mind

So your leaving
In the morning
On the early train
But I could say everythings alright
And I could pretend and say goodbye
But that would be lying,no

Because I cant stop loving you
(cant stop loving you)
No, I cant stop loving you
(I wont stop loving you)
No, I wont stop loving you
Why should I even try
Because I cant stop loving you
(cant stop loving you)
No, I cant stop loving you
(thats all I can do)
No, I wont stop loving you
Why should i
(why should I)
Why should i
(tell me why)
Why should I even try
--Courtesy : Phil Collins: Can’t Stop Loving You

Full of Masti, fun and little little work, this is how life@netapp.com is!!! Almost 9 months with no breaks had fun fun fun and only fun... Work environment was too gud. I miss u netapp, will surely join u if I get a oopty.

Frnds, couple of praises from my last project

Dhanjay has been invaluable to the SAP-Stage and Data Miner process and he will surely be missed. I have relied on his expertise and I will miss his genuine ability to get things done and his willingness to help me and everyone else.
-- Jim McMahan

I would like to thank Dhanjay for all the work he did to help me.
The work he did is giving me the ability to run my business, control my accounts and money.
For NetApp, Support Operations and me this was business critical.
Especially the efforts delivered to squeeze my (late submitted queries) into his busy schedule is extremely appreciated.
I enjoyed working with Dhanjay and the work he delivered pais off.
Dhanjay, much success wished in next opportunities.
-- Best regards, Michel Bangels

We are going to miss you Dhanjay. You've done a tremendous job in the past
couple of months.
Thanks a lot Dhanjay.
--Edwin Lichteveld

Can only repeat what Edwin is writing. You helped us a lot!!!
THANK YOU VERY MUCH
-- Greetings joe (Blum, Joachim)

Dhanjay,
You have been a tremendous help. We will surely miss you.
--Gary (Craig, Gary)

Thank you for your excellent work! I know I am not alone in wishing your
didn't have to leave.
--Tim (Kirby, Timothy)

Good luck on your next project, and thank you for the great job and help you did on this one.
-- Chris (Chris Peterson)

and lots lots lots lots of more.....................

A middle aged Andhra-Indian immigrant in Dallas, Texas bought a brand new convertible Porsche.

He took off down the road and pushed it up to 160 MPH and was enjoying the wind blowing through his (thinning) hair.

"This is great," he thought and accelerated to an even higher speed.

But when he eventually looked in his rear-view mirror there was a Ford Crown Victoria Police Car behind him, blue lights flashing.

"I can get away from him with no problem" thought the man and he floored it some more, and flew down the road at over 210 mph to escape being stopped.

Then he thought, what the hell am I doing? "I'm too old for this kind of thing" and pulled over to the side of the road, and waited for the Police car to catch up with him.

The Policeman pulled in behind the Porsche and walked up on the driver's side.

"Sir, my Shift ends in five minutes and today is Wednesday 22 November a day before Thanksgiving "If you can give me a good reason that I've never heard before as to why you were speeding, I'll let you go.

The man looked back at the Policeman and said,

Last week my wife, who is from Andhra-Pradesh ran off with an American Policeman and I thought you were bringing her back.

"The Policeman said, "Have a nice day, sir"

Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.

To Err is human, to forgive is not a COMPANY policy.

The road to success??.. Is always under construction.

Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk.

In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it.

All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive or fattening.

Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear brighter before you hear them speak.

Everyone has a scheme of getting rich?.. Which never works.

If at first you don't succeed?. Destroy all evidence that you ever tried.

You can never determine which side of the bread to butter. If it falls down, it will always land on the buttered side.

Anything dropped on the floor will roll over to the most inaccessible corner.

As soon as you mention something?? if it is good, it is taken?. If it is bad, it happens.

He who has the gold, makes the rules ---- Murphy's golden rule.

If you come early, the bus is late. If you come late?? the bus is still late.

Once you have bought something, you will find the same item being sold somewhere else at a cheaper rate.

When in a queue, the other line always moves faster and the person in front of you will always have the most complex of transactions.

If you have paper, you don't have a pen??. If you have a pen, you don't have paper?? if you have both, no one calls.

Especially for engg. Students----
If you have bunked the class, the professor has taken attendance.

You will pick up maximum wrong numbers when on roaming.

The door bell or your mobile will always ring when you are in the bathroom.

After a long wait for bus no.20, two 20 number buses will always pull in together and the bus which you get in will be crowded than the other.

If your exam is tomorrow, there will be a power cut tonight.

Irrespective of the direction of the wind, the smoke from the cigarette will always tend to go to the non-smoker

Celebration means...
Four friends. raining outside. Four glasses of Tea.

Celebration means...
Hundred bucks of petrol. A rusty old bike. And an open road.

Celebration means...
A hostel Tea. A hostel room. 12 a.m.

Celebration means...
3 old friends. 3 separate cities. 3 coffee mugs. 1 internet messenger.

Celebration means...
Rain on a hot tin roof. Pakodas deep-frying. Neighbours dropping in. A party.

Celebration means...
You and mom. A summer night. A bottle of coconut oil. A head massage.

You can spend
Hundreds on birthdays,
Thousands on festivals,
Hundreds of Thousands on weddings,
But to celebrate
All you have to do is spend your Time with your loved ones.