If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;If all men count with you, but none too much,If you can fill the unforgiving minuteWith sixty seconds' worth of distance run,Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!

-- Rudyard Kipling

Such is Human nature. Its foolish mistakes continue.

Useless hopes and dreams are not easy to overcome by reasons and common sense.
One clings widely to some vain hope, until a day comes when it has sucked the heart dry and then it breaks the rope that binds it and flies away. After that comes the misery of awakening.
But before long, one is filled once more with a desire to return to the same old mistakes!!

--Rabindra Nath Tagore

Alice came to the fork in the road.
"Which road do I take?" she asked.
"Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat.
"I don't know," Alice, answered.
"Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."
- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

How important is it to find a direction in life…to know where you are going and why?? Further how difficult is to choose road less traveled?

I have wondered about it for ages. Dilemma at every nook and corner. I have realized predicament is the result of too many choices. People say, you know deep in your heart what you want to do. Well the problem is we want to do everything. And sometimes I wish we had 3 or 4 parallel lives running so we could live each of our choices and see where it takes us. Well life being life, that doesn’t happen… So for all of us who are in one of those tight spots speculating your next step, remember what the Cheshire cat told Alice and unfortunately if the choice goes kaput…Well then its time to repress another memory!!!!

Keep smiling people!!!!

DILIP VENGSARKAR When you rearrange the letters: SPARKLING DRIVE

PRINCESS DIANA When you rearrange the letters: END IS A CAR SPIN

MONICA LEWINSKY When you rearrange the letters: NICE SILKY WOMAN

DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROO M

ASTRONOMER: When you rearrange the letters: MOON STARER

DESPERATION When you rearrange the letters: A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES: When you rearrange the letters: THEY SEE

A DECIMAL POINT: When you rearrange the letters: IM A DOT IN PLACE

MOTHER-IN-LAW: When you rearrange the letters: WOMAN HITLER

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

What is the speed of darkness?

Are there reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at the Special Olympics?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

Do you cry under water?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Did you ever stop and wonder......

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream ??

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? (This one kills me !!!!)

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Stop singing and read on . . .. . . . . . ..

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

A Man to God

Man:"Give me a bag full of money, a job and a vehicle full of girls"

God replies:"Granted"

and made him a bus conductor of a ladies' special bus!

moral: be specific........

Slow down for three minutes to read this. It is so worth it. Touching words from the mouth of babes. A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, 'What does love mean?'

The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined See what you think:
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'When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.'

Rebecca- age 8
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'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different..
You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.'

Billy - age 4
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'Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.'

Karl - age 5
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'Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.'

Chrissy - age 6
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'Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.'

Terri - age 4
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'Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.'

Danny - age 7
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'Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that.
They look gross when they kiss'

Emily - age 8
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'Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents
and listen.'

Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)
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'If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,'

Nikka - age 6
(we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)
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'Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.'

Noelle - age 7
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'Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.'

Tommy - age 6
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'During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling.
He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore.'

Cindy - age 8
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'My mommy loves me more than anybody
You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.'

Clare - age 6
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'Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.'

Elaine-age 5
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'Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.'

Chris - age 7
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'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.'

Mary Ann - age 4
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'I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.'

Lauren - age 4
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'When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you' (what an image)

Karen - age 7
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'You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.'

Jessica - age 8
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And the final one

The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.
Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there.
When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said,
'Nothing, I just helped him cry'

A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ' I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.'

The driver says, 'Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.'

Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control.'
As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, 'Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?'
The wife smiles demurely and says, 'You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did.'

As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, 'Damit, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?'

The officer frowns and says, 'And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine.' The driver says, 'Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket.'
The wife says, 'Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on ... you never wear your seat belt when you're driving.'

And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, 'WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??'
The officer looks over at the woman and asks, 'Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?'

I love this part....

'Only when he's been drinking.'