"We will do it"
means
" You will do it"
"You have done a great job"
means
"More work to be given to you"
"We are working on it"
means
"We have not yet started working on the same"
"Tomorrow first thing in the morning"
means
"Its not getting done...
At least not tomorrow !".
"After discussion we will decide - I am very open to views"
means
"I have already decided, I will tell you what to do"
"There was a slight miscommunication"
means
"We had actually lied"
"Lets call a meeting and discuss"
means
"I have no time now, will talk later"
"We can always do it"
means
"We actually cannot do the same on time"
"We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline"
means
"The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time."
"We had slight differences of opinion"
means
"We had actually fought"
"Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you"
means
"Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me"
"You should have told me earlier"
means
"Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!"
"We need to find out the real reason"
means
"Well I will tell you where your fault is"
"Well... family is important, your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected"
means
"Well you know..."
"We are a team"
means
"I am not the only one to be blamed"
"That's actually a good question"
means
"I do not know anything about it"
"All the Best"
means
" You are in trouble"
Song : Jiya Dhadak Dhadak
Movie : Kalyug (2005)
Singer : Rahat Fateh Ali Khan
Tuje Dekh Dekh Sona...
Tuje Dekh Dekh Jagan...
Maine Ye Zindagani, Sang Tere Beetani,
Tujme Basi He Meri Jaan Haaye,
(Jiya Dhadak Dhadak (3) Jaye) (2)
Kabse He Dil Me Mere Armaan Kai Ankahe
Inko Tu Sunle Aaja, Chahat Ke Rang Chadha Ja
Kehna Kabhi To Mera Maan Haaye,
(Jiya Dhadak Dhadak (3) Jaye) (2)
Lagta He Ye Kyu Muje, Sadiyo Se Chahu Tuje,
Mere Sapno Me Aake, Apna Mujko Banake,
Mujpe Tu Kar Ehsaan Haaye,
(Jiya Dhadak Dhadak (3) Jaye) (2)
Tuje Dekh Dekh Sona...
Tuje Dekh Dekh Jagan...
Maine Ye Zindagani, Sang Tere Beetani,
Tujme Basi He Meri Jaan Haaye,
(Jiya Dhadak Dhadak (3) Jaye) (2)
Song : Kasak uthi mere man me
Movie : Choodon Na Yaar (2007)
Singer : Anand Raj Anand
Kasak uthi mere man me, Piya mujhe gale laga le (2)
Kasak uthi mere man me, Piya mujhe gale laga le ..he..
Gale Laga le, Jiya dhadka le, Sapano ko apne saja le .. saja le..
Kasak uthi mere man me, Piya mujhe gale laga le
Piya Piya O re Piya, Piya O re Piya ..
Tu meri zindagi, jaha, tu mera man waha,
Duniya se kya waasta, tu hi mera sara jahan
Ankon me chhupa le, dil me basa le (2)
Ankon me chhupa le, dil me basa le ... Seene se apne laga le ... laga le
Kasak uthi mere man me, Piya mujhe gale laga le
Piya Piya O re Piya, Piya O re Piya ..
Bebasi ka gumaan tere sang manjoor he,
Apna tujhe maan kar dil mera magroor he,
Armaan sare, tujhpe he waare (2)
Armaan sare, tujhpe he waare, Khud ko kiya tere hawale... hawale
Kasak uthi mere man me, Piya mujhe gale laga le (3)
Gale Laga le, Jiya dhadkale, Sapano ko apne saja le .. saja le..
Kasak uthi mere man me, Piya mujhe gale laga le
One of d heart-touchy song, iam tempting to listen these days...
do anjaane ajnabi chale bandhane bandhan
haay re dil mein hai ye uljhan
milkar kyaa bole kyaa bole kyaa bole re milakar kyaa bole
nayi umamg nayi khushi mehak uthaa hai aangan
haay re ghar aaye man bhaavan
milkar kyaa bole kyaa bole kyaa bole re milkar kyaa bole
baichaini betaabi aaj mujhe ye kaisi
aaj hai jo peheli na thi dil ki haalat aisi
ankhon ko usika intajar hai
unhike liye ye roop shrigaar hai
dekhi hai taszir hi aaj milenge darshan
haay re badh ne lagi hai ulzan
milkar kyaa bole kyaa bole kyaa bole re milkar kyaa bole
roop ki raani aayi hai jaise gaganse utarake
mere liye kyaa mere liye aise sajake savarake
sabse chupaake idhar udhar se mujhako hi dekhe chor najarase
baat labon par hai ruki tejh dilon ki dhadakan
haay re kal ke sajani saajan
milkar kyaa bole kyaa bole kyaa bole re milkar kyaa bole
There is a beautiful and convincing explanation given by the Chinese.....
Thumb represents your Parents
Second (Index) finger represents your Siblings
Middle finger represents your-Self
Fourth (Ring) finger represents your Life Partner
& the Last (Little) finger represents your children
Firstly, open your palms (face to face), bend the middle fingers and hold them together - back to back
Secondly, open and hold the remaining three fingers and the thumb - tip to tip
(As shown in the figure below):
Now, try to separate your thumbs (representing the parents)..., they will open, because your parents are not destined to live with you lifelong, and have to leave you sooner or later.
Please join your thumbs as before and separate your Index fingers (representing siblings)...., they will also open, because your brothers and sisters will have their own families and will have to lead their own separate lives.
Now join the Index fingers and separate your Little fingers (representing your children)...., they will open too, because the children also will get married and settle down on their own some day.
Finally, join your Little fingers, and try to separate your Ring fingers (representing your spouse).
You will be surprised to see that you just CANNOT....., because Husband & Wife have to remain together all their lives - through thick and thin!
Vas just passing thru netapp workplace whiteboard whr dis piece of info left an impression on me, so vished to share vth u guys..
"Before you criticize someone,
walk a mile in his shoes.
That way, if he gets angry,
he'll be a mile away--and barefoot."
-- Sarah Jackson
A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience. Said he:"The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife!"
The audience was in silence and shock.
The speaker added: "And that woman was my mother!"
Laughter and applause.
A week later, a top manager trained by the motivational speaker tried to crack this very effective joke at home. He was a bit foggy after a drink.
He said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who was not my wife!"
The wife went wan with shock and rage.
Standing there for 20 seconds trying to recall the second half of the joke, the manager finally blurted out "... and I can't remember who she was!"
Moral of the story:
Don't copy if you can't paste!
E sanje yakagidhey
neenniladey e sanje yakagidhey
e santhey sakagidhey ..........
ಆ ಆ ಆ...ಆ ಆ ಆ...
ಈ ಸಂಜೆ ಯಾಕಾಗಿದೆ ನೀನಿಲ್ಲದೆಈ ಸಂಜೆ ಯಾಕಾಗಿದೆ..//೧//ಈ ಸಂತೆ ಸಾಕಾಗಿದೆ ನೀನಿಲ್ಲದೆಈ ಸಂತೆ ಸಾಕಾಗಿದೆ..ಏಕಾಂತವೇ ಆಲಾಪವೂ ಏಕಾಂಗಿಯಾ ಸಲ್ಲಾಪವೂಈ ಮೌನ ಬಿಸಿಯಾಗಿದೆ ಓ...ಈ ಮೌನ ಬಿಸಿಯಾಗಿದೆ // ಈ ಸಂಜೆ..//
ಲಾ ಲಾ ಲ ಲ ಲಾ ಲ ಲಾ ಲಾ....
ಈ ನೋವಿಗೆ ಕಿಡೀ ಸೋಕಿಸಿ ಮಜ ನೋಡಿವೇ ತಾರಾಗಣತಂಗಾಳಿಯ ಪಿಸುಮಾತಿಗೆ ಯುಗವಾಗಿದೇ ನನ್ನಾ ಕ್ಷಣಾನೆನಪೆಲ್ಲವೂ ಹೂವಾಗಿದೆ ಮೈ ಎಲ್ಲವೂ ಮುಳ್ಳಾಗಿದೆಈ ಜೀವ ಕಸಿಯಾಗಿದೇ..ಈ ಜೀವ ಕಸಿಯಾಗಿದೇ ..// ಈ ಸಂಜೆ..//
ಆ ಆ ಆ...ಆ ಆ ಆ..
ನೀನಿಲ್ಲದೇ ಆ ಚಂದಿರಾ ಈ ಕಣ್ಣಲೀ ಕಸವಾಗಿದೇಅದನೂದುವಾ ಉಸಿರಿಲ್ಲದೇ ಬೆಳದಿಂಗಳು ಅಸುನೀಗಿದೇಆಕಾಶದೀ ಕಲೆಯಾಗಿದೇ ಈ ಸಂಜೆಯಾ ಕೊಲೆಯಾಗಿದೇಈ ಗಾಯ ಹಸಿಯಾಗಿದೇ...ಈ ಗಾಯ ಹಸಿಯಾಗಿದೇ ..// ಈ ಸಂಜೆ.. //
After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increment, no commendation. So he decided to walk up to his HR Manager. His manager looked at him, smiled and asked him to sit down saying:"My friend you have not worked here for even a single day." The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.
Manager: How many days are there in a year?
Man: 365 days and sometimes 366.
Manager: How many hours make up a day?
Man: 24 Hours.
Manager: How long do u work in a day?
Man: 10am to 6pm i.e 8 hours a day.
Manager: So, what fraction of the day do u work in hours?
Man: He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 i.e 1/3 (one third).
Manager: This is nice of u! what is 1/3rd of 366 days?
Man: 122(1/3 x 366=122 in days)
Manager: Do u come to work on weekends?
Man: No sir.
Manager: How many days r there in a year that r weekends?
Man: 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days.
Manager: Thanks for that. If u remove 104 days from 122 days. how many days do u now have?
Man: 18 days.
Manager: I do give u 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that 14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do u have remaining?
Man: 4 days.
Manager: Do u work on Republic Day?
Man: No sir!
Manager: Do u come to work on Independence Day?
Man: No sir!
Manager: So how many days r left?
Man: 2 days Sir!
Manager: Do u come to work on New Years Day?
Man: No sir!
Manager: So how many days r left?
Man: 1 day sir!
Manager: Do u work on Christmas Day?
Man: No Sir!
Manager: So how many days r left?
Man: None Sir!
Manager: So what r u claiming?
Man: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...
Moral - NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!
HR - HIGH RISK.
A student asks a teacher, "What is love?"
The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the wheat field and choose the biggest wheat and come back. But the rule is: - you can go through them only once & cannot turn back to pick."
The student went to the field, go thru first row, he saw one big wheat, but he wonders....may be there is a bigger one later. Then he saw another bigger one... but may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him. Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he starts to realise that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw, he knew he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted. So, he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand. The teacher told him, "...this is love... you keep looking for better ones, but when later you realise, you have already missed the person...."*
"What is marriage then?" the student asked.
The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."
The student went to the corn field, this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake, when he reach the middle of the field, he has picked one medium sized corn that he felt satisfied, and came back to the teacher.
The teacher told him, "this time you bring back a corn.... you look for one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe this is the best one you get.... this is marriage."
Q. How will you call an Applet from a Java Script?
A. I will give invitation Card.
Q. What is JVM ?
A. Jilebi, Vada & Maaza
Q. Explain 2 tier and 3 -tier Architecture ?
A. Two wheelers like scooters will have 2 tyres and autorickshaws will
have 3 tyres.
Q. I want to store more than 10 objects in a remote server ? Which
methodology will follow ?
A. Send it through courier.
Q. Can I modify an object in CORBA ?
A. As you wish , I do not have any objections.
Q. How to communicate 2 threads each other ?
A. Non living things can't communicate.
Q. What is meant by flickering ?
A. Closing and opening of eyes at girls.
Q. Explain RMI Architecture?
A. I am a computer professional not an architect student.
Q. What is the use of Servlets ?
A. In hotels, they can replace servers.
Q. What is the dif ference between Process and Threads ?
A. Threads are small ropes. Make a rope from threads is an example for
process.
Q. When is update method called ?
A. Who is update method?
Q. What is JAR file ?
A. File that can be kept inside a jar.
Q. What is JINI ?
A. A ghost which was Aladdin's friend.
Q. How you can know about drivers and database information ?
A. I will go and enquire in the bus depot.
Q. What is serialization ?
A. Arranging one after the other from left to right.
Q. What is bean ? Where it can be used ?
A. A kind of vegetable. In kitchens for cooking they can be used.
Q. Write down how will you create a binary Tree ?
A. When we sow a binary seed , a binary tree will grow.
Q. What is the exact difference between Unicast and Multicast object ?
A. If in a society, if there is only one caste, then it is Unicast,
else it is multicast
When I Take a long time to finish,
I am slow,
When my boss takes a long time,
he is thorough
When I don't do it,
I am lazy,
When my boss does not do it,
he is busy,
When I do something without being told,
I am trying to
be smart,
When my boss does the same,
he takes the initiative,
When I please my boss,
I am apple polishing,
When my boss pleases his boss,
he is cooperating,
When I make a mistake,
you're an idiot.
When my boss makes a mistake,
he's only human.
When I am out of the office,
I am wandering around.
When my boss is out of the office,
he's on business.
When I am on a day off sick,
I am always sick.
When my boss is a day off sick,
he must be very ill.
When I apply for leave,
I must be going for an
interview
When my boss applies for leave,
it's because he's
overworked
When I do good,
my boss never remembers,
When I do wrong,
he never forgets
Have you seen recent advertisement of M/S SAINT GOBAIN GLASSES shown in
TELEVISION'S - Then you must have known about 2 Way mirror)
How to determine if a mirror is 2 way or not ? (Not a Joke!)
Not to scare you, but to make sure that you aware. Many of the Hotels
and Textile showrooms cheat the customers this way.
HOW TO DETECT A 2-WAY MIRROR?
When we visit toilets, bathrooms, hotel rooms, changing rooms, etc.,
How many of you know for sure that the seemingly ordinary mirror
hanging on the wall is a real mirror, or actually a 2-way mirror I.e.,
they can
see you, but you can't see them. There have been many cases of people
installing 2-way mirrors in female changing rooms or bathroom or
bedrooms.
It is very difficult to positively identify the surface by just looking
at it. So, how do we determine with any amount of certainty what type of
mirror we are looking at?
CONDUCT THIS SIMPLE TEST:
Place the tip of your fingernail against the reflective surface and if
there is a GAP between your fingernail and the image of the nail,
then it is a GENUINE mirror.
However, if your fingernail DIRECTLY TOUCHES the image of your nail,
then BEWARE, IT IS A 2-WAY MIRROR! (There may be someone seeing you
from the other side). So remember, every time you see a mirror, do
the "fingernail test." It doesn't cost you anything. It is simple to do.
This is a really good thing to do. The reason there is a gap on a real
mirror, is because the silver is on the back of the mirror UNDER the
glass.
Whereas with a two-way mirror, the silver is on the surface. Keep it in
mind! Make sure and check every time you enter in hotel rooms.
Ladies:
Share this with your friends.
Men:
Share this with your sisters, wives, daughters, friends, colleagues,
etc.
Pass this message to all Ur friends.
Dec 31st '07 long weekend, planned for tour to death valley, loss(los)Vegas and Grand Canyon.
Anyway, Grand Canyon is amazing indeed.
And did you know, there are many points on the Grand Canyon that are named "Vishnu Schist (the lowest strata of the canyon almost 1.5 billion years old)", "Brahma temple", "Shiva temple", "Rama Shrine" etc. Wonder how they got those names??
Googled and here's d info :
"Carved by nature devas into the Canyon's breathtaking buttes were "Shiva," "Vishnu" and "Brahma" temples, along with a "Vishnu Schist" and a "Hindu Amphitheatre." Going to the Canyon is a pilgrimage across immense stretches of time and rapturous landscape unlike any other on the planet. It's a geological phenomenon that reduces your physical body importance to zero while stretching your psychic awareness to God-like infinity. Every Hindu should pilgrimage to this fantastic nature temple. And indeed many do."
It is yet-another-rainy day here in Sunnyvale. Not even remotely my definition of good weather. And especially not so when we have had plenty of them rainy days since December. I acknowledge the power of the clouds and the wind that can so efficiently transform a bright, sunny day into a gloomy, rainy day.
Leaving behind my perspective of rainy weather, I begin to wonder where the rhyme "Rain, rain, go away" originated.
Rain rain go away,
Come again another day,
Little Johnny wants to play,
Rain, rain, go to Spain,
Never show your face again!
According to this link that I chanced upon in my search for an answer, the rhyme originated way back in the late 1500s. And the rivalry between England & Spain during that period, explains why the rhyme implores the rain to go to Spain. Talking of rain & Spain draws back from my memory, the famous dialogue from 'My Fair Lady' - "The rain in Spain, stays mainly in the plains".
While on the train of thoughts revolving around verses on rain that one has known since childhood. Having dwelt upon sweet childhood verses, how could I ever complain about the rains that brought me to them today!
Laloo
One day Laloo was traveling by his car.
He was going to a village for campaigning. Suddenly a piglet came before
the car. The driver couldn't hit the brake at the right time and
unfortunately the baby pig was killed in the accident.
At the sight Laloo was deeply moved and felt very upset. He called the
driver and said,"Jiska e suuar hai hum usko compensesan dena chahta hoon.
Usko dhundke lao".
At his words the driver went to the nearest village and came back after
some time with a tilak on his forehead, garlands around his neck and lots
of money in his hands!!!
Laloo was surprised. He asked,"Hum tumko kaha tha ke uss aadmi ko laiye,
aur tum aise wapas aaye ho! Baat kya hai?
At this the driver replied " I told them about the incident. Hearing it
they were rejoiced, put tilak and garlands on me, then danced for some time
and gave this money."
Laloo then asked him "Aap unko eg-jectly kaa bola?"
The driver replied:
"Main bola, mein Laloo Prasad Yadav ka driver hoon,
maine suaar ke bachhe ko mar dala hai......... ."
Divorce: Indian Style
After 48 years of marriage, an elderly man in Bombay calls his son in New
York and says, "I hate to ruin your day son, but I have to tell you that
your mother and I are getting a divorce; 45 years of misery is enough!"
"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams.
"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the old man says.
"We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call
your sister in Hong Kong and tell her!"
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck
they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this."
She calls Bombay immediately, and screams at the old man, "You are not
getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my
brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a
thing, DO YOU HEAR??" and she hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay", he says,
"It's all set. They're both coming for Diwali and paying their own
airfare!!"
